I went and saw Nate yesterday, I don't know if I said it before or not but it was suppose to be my last visit. I did end up scheduling another visit but I am going to call and cancel it. I can't keep going to the jail anymore. I need to be free from him, from his issues with me, his yelling, and his crap. It just CAN NOT continue.
When I left the jail I was in, for lack of better words, a funk. One that would not lift no matter what I did. I even talked to Scott on the phone for a half hour...It seemed to help but not much. When I called there he was still sleeping, at 5:35 in the afternoon, and they woke him up. I felt bad, but at the same time I thought for sure it would help. And it did, for a little while. And then suddenly it crept back up on me.
Stephanie and I took Hayley to the park. I wish I could remember more, but I just can't. I was that out of it.I do know that we were having fun, if I'm not mistaken. I have tons of pics from my cell phone... Finally, Steph stole my cell phone and called Scott. We were about 2 mins from his house. I guess she told him his girlfriend was acting weird and it was freaking her out. And could she bring me there. He said yes. I remember getting in the car, and her driving me there. And then I remember him coming out and talking to me. I remember his arm around me, telling me everything would be okay. And then I remember getting out of the car and just wrapping my arms around him. We just stood there, me in his arms. And finally I felt that oddness lifting. I apologized for him missing some of the Red Wings game, and he said basically
that I was more important than the game.By the time we left there I was feeling much better. I didn't feel so out of it anymore. And for that I thank Stephanie, for contacting him and driving me there. And I thank my wonderful boyfriend for caring enough to help me feel better. It was odd and I know there is stuff that I will never remember. But I also know I am safe with Scott and he will be there to make me feel safe.
This is why I can not go back to the jail. I can not allow my self to get that out of it again. I NEED to stay away from Nate.
Anyways, I am sure this makes NO sense whats so ever but maybe later after I have slept I can fix it...I donno. But for now I will close with a couple pictures....I absolutely adore these pictures..And they turned out fairly good given they were taken with my 2.0 mega pixel camera phone....
There is other stuff I want to talk about but not now...Maybe later...
~~Sara~~
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